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Tuesday, October 19, 2004 - 10:39 PM
Two Cinci girls take the Atkins into their bedrooms and out of other guys
By Colleen King
Binging & purging are part of our society. We gobble up more than our fill on Thanksgiving, knock back as many as we can each Saturday night, gorge on goodies at Christmas, power shop each Sunday afternoon at the mall and devour immense meals at Chinese buffets.
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We love life in excess. Western culture is gluttony driven. With our over consumptive behavior, it would seem that it would be completely normal to abstain from these behaviors once in a while. But other than dieting there doesn’t seem to be an acceptable way to abstain.
As this mentality fits so easily into our society’s eating lifestyle, it would not be complicated to allow it to extend into other facets of our lives.
Recently, I became aware of two local women who were doing just this. They claimed that too often on their Saturday and Sunday mornings, they were in places they didn’t necessarily want to be: “some guy’s bed.”
So, each vowed to “settle down for a while” and begged the rest of their girlfriends to not allow them to go home with anyone, under any circumstances. Their sex lives were getting out of control, and they needed to be restrained.
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They had combined two of the deadliest sins, lust and gluttony, and their remedy was a starvation period. These young ladies have agreed to become “born-again virgins.”
While they are not reclaiming their virginity and they aren’t assuming they will be married before their next sexual encounter, the premise of their decision, according to Wendy Keller’s book, The Cult of the Born-Again Virgin, their choices to abstain from sex in response to STDs, pregnancy and the over-all feeling of being a “ho,” are exactly the reasons people choose everyday to become born-again virgins. The choice for the duration is up to everyone, as an individual. One can wait a year, till marriage, a month or even a day.
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Each girl had a different catalyst for deciding to break out of their sexually-extroverted routine. One, after a short discussion with me, was sent into a flurry about diseases, pregnancy and her future. She realized her choices might not have been keeping her safe. And just as our mother’s told us not to talk to strangers, she agreed not to sleep with them either.
The second girl came to her own conclusion after realizing she had spent the night with a married man. Her guilt consumed her as she imagined his wife and her feelings, and she couldn’t believe he or she had done such a thing. Distress alerted her to the possibility that it may not have even been the first time… and it was not something she wanted to repeat.
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So, the girls have taken a leave of absence from the sexual world, just as I have taken a leave from eating chocolate and Skyline three ways. Maybe this isn’t so different. I am starving myself of something I adore to acquire smaller thighs, and they are going without to regain the confidence, the self-esteem and the control they know they should have. We aren’t so different. We live in a world obsessed with devouring and diets. We are infatuated with the idea of too much and too little.
Is this sexual lifestyle a new version of the diet? Is Trojan going to see the same problem that the bread and potato companies have seen during the Atkins revolution? Will holding hands and dates actually appear as did Fat-Free, Low Carb or Lite?
Colleen King’s column “Miss King Meets the Queen City” is a comprehensive look at “20 and 30-something” relationships in Cincinnati. Her column appears regularly in QCF Magazine.
Links
· Planned Parenthood
· Dr. Drew's Website --- Sex, relationships, advice
· Information about Hymenoplasty --- a surgery that replaces a woman's hymen.
· Diet information
Contact Information
· colleenk@queencityforum.com
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